Ellen Hankes

Gifts: Transfer of Ownership

 'Tis the season of generous gifts! The presents are carefully chosen with an eye on the constraints of the budget. We focus on choosing the perfect gift for a special relative, friend or colleague.

Whoa, hold the reindeer. Let's consider some fine points of receiving gifts.

A gift is a gift. There is a transfer of ownership. The gift is presented to another person who becomes the owner of that item. As I work with chronically disorganized individuals who are seeking to de-clutter and organize their living or work spaces, gifts can be items of conflict for them. The conversation often goes, "I would like to donate this to charity, but it was a gift from Aunt Char. It is not my color (size, style or ...) and I cannot use it."

With a gift comes a sentiment of affection or respect. While the physical gift stays with the recipient or moves on to another life, the sentiment can be remembered and appreciated. A true gift is far more than just a thing. A true gift is accompanied by good will. Of course it is important to consider a gift giver's feelings when accepting gifts and putting them to use. It is a fine line to walk, but remember that gift giving involves a transfer of ownership. Focus on relationships and not the things.

Merry Christmas. May you enjoy the gifts of love and friendship wherever you go during the New Year.

 

Addressing Your Layers of Life

  The early morning or late afternoon walks along the Wabash Trace are wonderful for counting blessings, solving life opportunities (no problems, just opportunities), and soaking in the wonderful fall sensory pleasures.

There are so many layers within the wooded trail. Year after year the leaves fall, the branches and brambles break, an occasional tree becomes more horizontal than vertical. Layer upon layer of material piles up. What was once on top of the pile sinks to the middle, or even to the bottom of the material.

As I walk I think about the wide and varied interests of the fascinating people we have encountered. For some, one new hobby or interest falls on top of the other interests. Overwhelm sets in as there are not enough hours in the day or room in the workspace or home to accommodate all of the material. Things seem to pile up in the brain with the most recent interest falling to the top, obscuring what was important yesterday and the day before.

Come along on a walk with me, and we will talk about your opportunities for addressing your layers of life! We can also talk or email. Let's talk about those layers of life and how you can prepare for the important things ahead in your life!

Chronic Procrastinators Find Many Stop Signs

Procrastination is a challenge for many. Psychology Today says one in five people identify themselves as Chronic Procrastinators. Procrastination can be compared to a huge red stop sign that pops up every time there is a decision to be made or a task that needs to be accomplished.

While there are many reasons for procrastinating, or putting things off until later, here are a few reasons that might resonate with you.

• Lack of information. Janine delays getting a flu shot this year because she hasn't had time to research the most cost-effective place to get the immunization. Should she go to the drug store, her doctor's office or a new store that offers the flu shot? The months fly by. Janine never did get the flu shot. In this information-based world, we never will have all the information we need for every decision we need to make. There is simply not time!
• Inaccurate perception of time required for tasks.It's a fact that we tend to overestimate the time it takes to do the things we enjoy doing and underestimate the time to do the things we enjoy. Doug delays taking out the garbage because it will "take too long" but can spend "just a few more minutes on Facebook."
• Overwhelm. People who are chronically disorganized may find that it is difficult to find somewhere to start with big projects so they delay starting and finishing the task at hand.

If you want to make overcoming procrastination a priority, I recommend It's About Time: The 6 Styles of Procrastination and How to Overcome Them by Dr. Linda Sapadin. Learning more about how and why you procrastinate will help you become more productive and organized. 

Are You a Compulsive Shopper?

As a professional organizer, I continue to take classes and learn how to help my clients lead more productive lives through more effective personal and workplace organization. Compulsive buying was a topic of a recent telecourse I took through the National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization (NSGCD).

Do you think you could be a compulsive shopper?  Take this brief seven-question quiz  published in the Journal of Consumer Research to help to determine if you are a compulsive shopper.

According to April Lane Benson, Ph.D. the compulsive need to overshop is often triggered by emotional needs that are unmet, It may not be a new shirt that is needed, but rather a relief from boredom or loneliness. It is easy for a person to become overwhelmed with the sheer volume of the results of overshopping. A professional organizer can help address the space issues but it is vital that the cause of the overshopping be addressed as well.

We are surrounded with countless opportunities to shop--malls and shops, glossy catalogs, the internet, shopping channels on television and fund-raising efforts for many organizations. If you suspect you or someone close to you may be a compulsive shopper, take some time to learn more about overshopping and its effects.

Why Do People Consult Professional Organizers?

Too much clutter is the top reason professional organizers are hired, according to the 2009 NAPO Member Survey. Results of the national survey were just released by The Organizing Authority®--the National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO). The top three reasons people ask for help from an organizer are:

1. Clutter (75%)
2. General disorganization (71%)
3. Help in making decisions about keeping or discarding (53%)

Companies and non-home offices most often consult an organizer  to implement systems to improve general employee productivity.

Reasons businesses most frequently hire organizers are:

1. Improve productivity (66%)
2. Maximize office space (58%)
3. Improve employee organizational skills (55%)

A professional organizer is often called in as a last approach rather than a part of a strategy for better living and higher productivity. Relationships may already be damaged, health and safety can be compromised, and a high degree of frustration could exist by the time an organizer is consulted. First-time clients are often surprised at the non-judgmental approach used by the professional organizer who adheres to a code of confidentiality and ethical, trained approaches. New clients are also amazed at the differences in their lives as they celebrate what they have learned working with a professional organizer.

Hanging on to Yesterday?

Moving forward can be exhilarating for many, but it can also be a scary time. Some people thrive on dealing with new and uncharted territory and for others it can be a painful time.

Sometimes people keep many mementos of relatives long gone, souvenirs of memorable times, and reminders of happier days. Just having these things helps individuals hang on when change surrounds them.

Each person determines what works best for them in terms of space and maintenance of the reminders of times long past. However, for some the past gets the way of the present and future. Space is devoted to things that have lost their significance. Items are kept out of guilt or misguided responsibility. Somewhere in the turning of the calendar pages yesterday becomes today.

Kara L. Swanson tells the story of change so well in Baseball, Hot Dogs, Apple Pie and Chevrolet. Kara's life changed dramatically during her journey with a traumatic brain injury. Here is what Kara L. Swanson says about change

"If tomorrow is simply another  yesterday, they wouldn’t call it tomorrow.  If tomorrow were only yesterday, we’d be going backwards.  But we’re not. 

We’re going forwards."

Are you hanging onto yesterday in a way that keeps your todays and tomorrows from being what they could be?

Secrets of Saying No

Interesting people are often interested in many things. When asked or invited to participate in an activity the automatic response may be "Yes, I would love to do that." Moments later regret steals the excitement. The next thought may be "I wish I had said No!"

You'll find some useful techniques for saying no in The Simple Life: Eight Strategies to Keep Our Wonderful Enthusiasm in Check by Sandy Maynard. You'll even find a way to gracefully change your mind!

What is your secret of saying No?

Shopping Outcomes Different for Collectors, Compulisve Shoppers and Hoarders

Two shopping bags full of new-found treasures can result in uniquely different outcomes for Collectors, Compulsive Shoppers and Hoarders. Lynne Gilberg, CPO-CD, a Los Angeles, CA, professional organizer suggests how these three kinds of individuals respond to shopping and acquiring in a National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization subscriber publication.

Collectors purchase items with the intention of adding them to an existing group of similar items. The collection is often displayed in the collector's home and space is usually available for additional pieces as purchased.

Compulsive Shoppers intend to integrate newly purchased items into their closets, kitchens or workbenches. However, the new item may languish in a bag in the car or somewhere on the floor. A compulsive shopper may intend to return an item but lacks the receipt, the time, the energy, or the interest to make the return happen.

Hoarders may acquire items without realistic expectations of using or storing the material. An individual with hoarding tendencies may find it difficult to decide where the item belongs in their living space. Consequently, a large mass of material can compromise the individual's health and safety.

Today many Americans are reviewing their shopping habits with budget counselors and financial planners. Professional organizers can be part of the team that helps individuals plan and assimilate purchases in a way that supports their goals and dreams for the future.

Disorganization Unleashes Intense Emotions

  Embarrassment. Shame. Disappointment. Many disorganized people feel these intense emotions on a daily basis.

The clutter-laden adult is embarrassed to have anyone come to her home because of the mountain of stuff. The school child has been shamed one more time because the completed homework didn't make it to school in the backpack, The salesperson is disappointed because of misplaced vital contacts.

What a boatload of emotions disorganization unleashes! Consider these tips for dealing with the emotional side of disorganization:

• Take a deep breath. Send a dose of oxygen to the brain and give yourself a moment to regroup.
• Take and make time. Most organization issues take a long time to build and some time is necessary to create a better situation. Schedule time to focus on organizing.
• Delegate. Do what you do well and hand off to others things that they do best. Family and friends can help if they are supportive of your needs. A professional organizer can guide you towards your goals in a non-judgmental way.
• Learn more about yourself. What do you do well? Recognizing and honoring your strengths will minimize your rough spots.

What words describe how you feel about your disorganization? We would like to hear from you.

Organize Ready in No Time Outfits

Most of us have our favorite outfits and complementary accessories which we turn to when the pace gets hectic. Just like good friends, our favorite clothes are the ones that the ones that help us when the times are tough.

Jill Kreiger Swanson in her great little book Simply Beautiful Inside and Out suggests pulling together outfits that are ready to go. Here's how it works: put all pieces that go together on one hanger, including accessories such as jewelry or scarves.

Here's one of my current favorite combinations. There is no searching for the black cotton sweater to go with the French blue collared shirt. The new longer length necklace with blue and green beads ads a bit of color and fun to the outfit. I can add jeans or black pants for casual or dressier wear. Having three pre-planned items together on the hanger streamline the decision-making in the closet.

Keep a couple these "Ready In No Time" outfits together and you will look pulled together with minimal time and effort!

What is your secret to getting dressed on the busiest of days? We would like to hear from you.